Being a bridesmaid is a great honor but for grown-ups, being the bridesmaid, or worse, the maid of honor for one of your best friends can be an experience that you may not want to repeat too often or ever again!

Here are 15 things I learned as a bridesmaid veteran of five weddings:

1. Remember it’s not your day!  The bride is the center of attention and it is her big day so be prepared to cater for her every whim.  After all, as bridesmaid you only have to deal with Little Miss’ tantrums and spats for a few rehearsals and the day of the wedding, after that the poor guy she’s marrying has to deal with her for life;
2. While you may not be the center of attention as far as the wedding is concerned, you can be assured of being the center of attention for lots of guys!  I should know because I met my husband when I was a bridesmaid for the 4^th time but be careful if you are thinking this will be a great way to find a catch because:
3. Never, and I mean NEVER! Let a guy open the door and escort you if he calls you “Sugar”, “Babe” or worse, “Sugarbabe!”;
4. Do not let a bride convince you to wear grapevine as headgear.  Yes you can still find it, on a remote hillside in South Carolina on property owned by a gun toting hillbilly aged 72 and related to Jed Clampett as both his brother and second uncle;
5. Wearing woven grapevine leaves marks, both physical and emotional, which last for up to 6 months, if you have the choice, wear a crown of thorns instead;
6. Glue guns are a great invention for people who want to stick things and are not worried about whether they will explode or not – just remember that glue guns do overheat and will overheat because they are going to get a lot of use and as bridesmaid, you have to pitch in;
7. Brides want everyone to wear matching ear rings so be prepared to get your ears pierced if you haven’t already done so;
8. If you are asked to write a speech, do not retell the time when your “Best Friend”, who is getting married, was violently ill after drinking too much and ended the evening clinging to the toilet, swearing the world was ending and she couldn’t let it go because there was an earthquake (we lived in Ohio at the time);
9. If you are serious about catching the bouquet when the bride throws it, make sure you are wearing an outfit which will hold you in, as falling out of the top of your dress while stretching for the flowers can be very revealing resulting in more guys calling you “Sugar”, “Babe” etc;
10. Do NOT get drunk at the reception!;
11. The old saying, “Always a bridesmaid and never a bride!” is simply not true, I’m happily married to my husband whom I met when serving as a bridesmaid at wedding number 4;
12. Do everything you can to convince the bride that bridesmaid can get out of their dresses and into practical dress as soon as possible for the evening.  If she won’t budge on this, make sure the bridesmaids dresses are comfortable and practical if you have to spend the day in them;
13. The same applies to shoes!
14. Buying gifts for the bride and groom should really be about getting them things they will enjoy – people buy the most boring and unoriginal gifts which cost a fortune but the ones that make an impression are the ones where a lot of thought has gone into them;
15. Being a bridesmaid for five friends I am not interested in repeating the experience unless by new baby girl really wants me to do it for her !

Danforth Diamond, online wedding jewelry and fine engagement rings.

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Wow.  What a time in life.  If you’ve been selected to give the Maid of Honor Speech at your friend’s wedding, you’re likely trying to get some ideas.  Allow me to attempt to provide you with the best of what I know from my years of experience as a professional speaking consultant.

Planning is important, and you’ve done a great thing by looking for information ahead of time.  You’d be surprised how many people ignore the fear they have about public speaking and tell themselves “I’ll figure it out the couple of days before,” “the night before,” or God forbid “in the car on the way there.  ” By the way, if you’re not feeling nervous, I’m worried.  What I’m trying to convey here is that it’s completely normal to feel anything from a tad jittery to utterly panicked at the idea of giving your maid of honor speech.  It’s totally normal.  I still get nervous every single time I prepare to speak, whether at a professional engagement, or even a casual dinner.  Okay, now that you are assured your nerves are normal, let’s take a look at the maid of honor speech itself.

The technical aspects of the Maid of Honor Speech:

First, you might consider starting by telling the audience who you are, and thanking them for coming.  Then, think about a story or two.  Everyone on the planet loves to hear a story.  The first might be something about what you thought of the groom when you first met him.  This always seems to be a good topic, because it’s perfectly acceptable for you to just slightly poke fun at him, as if to say “I wasn’t really sure about Jim when he first started dating Laura.  He drove this old beat up car and had a slightly strange craving for French fries after midnight.”

Hello!  Just in case I haven’t had the chance to meet you in person yet, I’m _________.  I’m the maid of honor today, and I’m so proud of _______ (the bride).  First, I want to say congrats ________(bride & groom).  Also, thanks to _______(the bride’s parents, who likely put on the wedding) and everyone who came from near and far to be here with ________(bride and groom) on their very special day.

Keep any jabs you might consider aiming at the groom in your maid of honor speech to a low level.  As you will probably be sensing just thinking about your past experience, at a wedding, people place the parts of themselves that might be frustrated about the “darker side” of humanity on hold .  They are there to experience feelings of love, joy and happiness.  They don’t want to be reminded about the nasty things that can come out in people, like lust, greed, pain, etc .  So keep from telling jokes that might hint at these things.  A tiny, ever-so-slightly negative comment about the groom is okay, but only once, and if you do, try to make it very light.

When I first ran across ____ (groom), I recall wondering whether everything would work out. I recall him coming to the door (or hearing about him knocking on her door if you weren’t living with the bride) one night at midnight calling for _____(bride).  He was wearing this old flannel shirt, and I think asked ____(bride) if she wanted to get some french fries.I had my second thoughts , but as I got to know him better, I began to see he was an easy person to talk to, he has a good sense of humor, and eventually I came to the conclusion he was a perfect match for ______(bride).  I want to be the second to welcome _______(groom) to the family. We hope we can show you the same outgoing and open spirit as you have shown us.

To continue with this exact speech example, see this site: with an example Maid of Honor Speech.

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